Haven’t posted in months.
Why? I don’t think I’ve
had anything new or interesting to say.
My life seems pretty normal- at least to me. I live way up high in the mountains of
Montana, in a valley called the Cinnabar basin, and watch elk and now horses
out my back window.
I have frequent
discussions with my house regarding what is the acceptable level of cleanliness that does
not cause me distress.
I’ve realized I
talk to myself waay too much (conversations with the house not included), and
trying to keep silent when alone is a challenge. (Thank goodness for our dogs;
at least they offer a legitimate reason for vocalizing!).
We had snow in June, and 2 weeks later temps
in the 90’s.
My big daily fashion
decision is which pair of jeans and T-shirt I should wear.
Not exactly normal for most folks, I agree.
Friends and family call and ask me what is
new; my response is usually “Not much.”
I’m mostly content living my day-to-day, watching the many moods of the
mountains.
Once upon a time, I was determined to make Big changes in
the/my world. Whatever I was going to
do, I felt compelled to do it in a big way.
I had to be the best damn student/daughter/wife/designer/ creative
director/mother/writer/ realtor in the land.
Obviously, these were not realistic goals. While pretty good at a number of them, there
were just not enough hours in my day to Change the World.
I’ve made my peace that the world will do just fine,
thank-you-very-much, with my input or without it. Looking back, I keep thinking ‘whew! how exhausting.’ All that energy put into attempted extra-achieving.
Perhaps if I’d let my Inner bitch come out and play more often, I woulda had
more energy at the end of the day. You
have to admit there is something freeing about flipping forward your first
thoughts and actions without worrying how others will feel. Getting older does give me a more relaxed
perspective…
May your days of reflection bring a calmness to your soul…. And
if that doesn’t work, bring out that Inner bitch!
hahaha! I have been contemplating the same!
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